Hey, I went to daycare when I was younger.\u00c2\u00a0 I learned things, so don’t blame me.\u00c2\u00a0 There were girls.\u00c2\u00a0 They were pretty… and they played hand games (stop that!).\u00c2\u00a0 You don’t say no to that, do you?\u00c2\u00a0 You take one for the team, you walk it off, you learn, for the sake of being next to the gals, shameful things like:<\/p>\n
Miss Mary had a steamboat<\/em>
\nThe steamboat had a bell<\/em>
\nMiss Mary went to Heaven<\/em>
\nThe steamboat went to–<\/em>
\n— Hello, Operator<\/em>
\nPlease give me number 9<\/em>
\nAnd if you disconnect me,<\/em>
\nI’ll kick you from behind <\/em>
\nThe ‘fridgerator<\/em>
\nThere was a piece of glass<\/em>
\nMiss Mary sat upon it<\/em>
\nAnd broke her little<\/em>
\nAsk me no more questions<\/em>
\nI’ll tell you no more lies<\/em>
\nThe boys are in the bathroom<\/em>
\nZipping up their<\/em>
\nFlies are in the meadow<\/em>
\nThe bees are in the park<\/em>
\nThe boys and girls are kissing<\/em>
\nIn the d-a-r-k, d-a-r-k, d-a-r-k<\/em>
\nDark, dark, dark!<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\nMy personal favorite, however, and the one I can’t believe is still floating around that great grey soup swishing about in my head, is the following:<\/p>\n
Bo-bo, skee-ot-dot<\/em>
\nOon-not, oon-ney-ney<\/em>
\nI am boom-boom<\/em>
\neenie-meenie, dot-dot<\/em>
\nbo-bo, skee-ot-dot<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\nBefore you ask, no, I have no clue what it means.\u00c2\u00a0 But I do recall you were supposed to strike lightning-fast after the last line and pop the other person on the head.\u00c2\u00a0 Kids’ games, man–they’re frickin’ brutal.<\/p>\n
I need to see if I can wrangle the Insta-Princess into working out the hand movements with me.\u00c2\u00a0 I’m rusty; maybe she recalls them.\u00c2\u00a0 If so, instant YouTube video.\u00c2\u00a0 Clearly, we’re meant to be Internet stars.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Hey, I went to daycare when I was younger.\u00c2\u00a0 I learned things, so don’t blame me.\u00c2\u00a0 There were girls.\u00c2\u00a0 They were pretty… and they played hand games (stop that!).\u00c2\u00a0 You don’t say no to that, do you?\u00c2\u00a0 You take one for the team, you walk it off, you learn, for the sake of being next […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-138","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-live-a-little"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.skipfitz.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/138","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.skipfitz.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.skipfitz.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.skipfitz.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.skipfitz.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=138"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/www.skipfitz.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/138\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":141,"href":"https:\/\/www.skipfitz.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/138\/revisions\/141"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.skipfitz.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=138"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.skipfitz.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=138"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.skipfitz.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=138"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}